It’s in times like these when our country sits on the precipice of a deep chasm of outrageous national debt and certain destruction that character is born and the things that truly matter become clear through the fog of our own confusion. I refuse to believe that Clay Aiken is gay. That man is as straight as a ruler and only loves poon-tang. If he were any more butch he’d be Anita Bryant.
Yeah, I know. Aiken has officially come out of the closet, but that’s just what he expects us to believe. It’s a game he’s been playing for years. Clay is notorious for cruising women that have a fetish for trying to recruit from the other team. Word on the interwebs is that Aiken indulges in month long orgies with women determined to screw him straight. He’s a clever guy.
Do two consenting adults have the right to do anything behind closed doors? What about the minority? What about the non-consenting adult who enjoys public self-inflicted rape? I couldn’t help but notice that the Presidential debates will be arriving on Friday. After Obama publically humiliates McCain I can only wonder if he would consider himself in that minority if he decides on a second debate. McCain is going to end up sounding like Tom Cruise defending Scientology.
On another note. . . .
It turns out my favorite crack whore, Bambi Tyree, is on the witness list for the Senator Stevens trial. For those who don’t know, Bambi was 14 when she began her life as a working girl. Republican and CEO of Veco Oil, Bill Allen, began having sex with Bambi long before he began bribing legislators. It’s a long and lurid tale that will unfold nicely for my schandenfreud guru if court TV picks up the trial.
Yeah, I know. Aiken has officially come out of the closet, but that’s just what he expects us to believe. It’s a game he’s been playing for years. Clay is notorious for cruising women that have a fetish for trying to recruit from the other team. Word on the interwebs is that Aiken indulges in month long orgies with women determined to screw him straight. He’s a clever guy.
Do two consenting adults have the right to do anything behind closed doors? What about the minority? What about the non-consenting adult who enjoys public self-inflicted rape? I couldn’t help but notice that the Presidential debates will be arriving on Friday. After Obama publically humiliates McCain I can only wonder if he would consider himself in that minority if he decides on a second debate. McCain is going to end up sounding like Tom Cruise defending Scientology.
On another note. . . .
It turns out my favorite crack whore, Bambi Tyree, is on the witness list for the Senator Stevens trial. For those who don’t know, Bambi was 14 when she began her life as a working girl. Republican and CEO of Veco Oil, Bill Allen, began having sex with Bambi long before he began bribing legislators. It’s a long and lurid tale that will unfold nicely for my schandenfreud guru if court TV picks up the trial.
Don't forget:
Your life is a parody of a tragedy. A riddle wrapped in an enigma served in a mystery and covered with secret sauce that's been left out too long. It just a ride.
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