Boehner of Orange and my Schadenfreude Guru

My schadenfreude guru has been resurrected by the national enquirer.  Like a crack addict scoring a lifetime supply in a drug deal, schadenfreude has filled the pleasure center of my brain when it was reported that the happily married John Boehner was guilty of a sexual affair with two different women; Washington lobbyist Lisbeth Lyons and Leigh LaMora, the former press secretary to ex-Colorado Congressman Joel Hefley. 

http://www.nationalenquirer.com/john_boehner_house_speaker_sex_scandal_two_women/celebrity/70110
 
When republican Rep. Chris Lee resigned after placing his shirtless pic on Craig’s List, my schadenfreude was short lived.  His quick resignation spiked the continuing story of what else he had done on Craig’s list.  How mad were his real perversions that possible exposure calls for fleeing?  Lee is a republican so imagining him to be into sadomasochistic animal necrophilia would be like beating a dead horse. 

Boehner of Orange

Crying as much as he does it’s not hard to wonder about the sanity of John Boehner.  I’m convinced he’s an alcoholic.  I think he’s drunk most of the day.   It becomes very apparent if you’ve grown up around functional drunk lobbyists and politicians like myself.  Overly emotional moments are just one of the signs.  Drunken liaisons with power groupies are mandatory.  Judging from his pallor, Boehner has been drinking orange flavored schnaps.  It's not uncommon for closeted alcoholics to drinks schnaps in an effort to camouflage their breath.